i cant take my eyes of you

Its hard to let it go. It never was easy. She always had a soft spot for him. All these years he was her exception. She gave in when it came to him. But every single time she gave in, he broke her heart. She got hurt. Thrice by the same person. How could she let herself go through such pain. The scar will never fade nor she will forget. The memories they made with each other was too sweet to forget. Every touch every kiss seem surreal. She remembers how he will look into her eyes and kiss her gently. She remembers how tight he held her at night and not letting go. She had a big smile plastered on her face. She was so happy. It was unforgettable..

What did she do to deserve this? What did she do to be hurt again? Why is he behaving this way?

She doesnt know..

But one thing for a fact..he made her happy for that one day. That one day, I will remember it for the rest of my life..

Like he said...maybe in future who knows it maybe perfect...

Never say Never

Never ever say " that wont happen to me" because life has a funny way of proving you wrong. I thought hey it was a mistake the first time but the second time it happened it was by choice. Again it felt so real so right but so wrong at the same time.

Feeling his fingers move across my tummy, holding me tighter every minute as we lay there watching a movie. In the midst of the stormy windy night we held each other. Memories came back and we followed our heart. We followed how we felt for each other and it was perfect.

Circumstances were as such that it was not the right time. We decided to keep this as a memory and return to our lives being friends. It hurts oh yea it sure does hurt alot. Maybe someday in future. We never know what the future will bring us. It didnt work out the first time and the second time. Who knows maybe it is preparing us for something else.

I miss him already. His warm kisses, his big strong arms, his big smile. I miss just laying there listening to his heartbeat. I felt happy and so complete..

I guess things happen for a reason and someday it will all make sense. One thing I know is that I will always have you in me and I will always be a little bit in love wit you..and thats okay..

I will always remember what happened and it is the best memory yet we ever created.

thousand miles

Almost three months now since I've left home to pursue my degree. The loneliness I felt when I first walked into my new home is still lingering. I woke up this morning calling out for him but then I realised I was more than a thousand miles away. Every part of me misses him and being away has made me realise how much he means to me.

Sometimes I wonder how did I end up with such a great guy whom I feel I don't deserve after what I did. But people make mistakes, no one is perfect.

At times I wonder maybe its karma that has come to pay me a visit. I've learnt from the mistake and I would never want it to happen again.

I have something to look forward to. My handsome prince is coming over pretty soon. It feels like a dream everytime I think of it. The thought of it makes all the loneliness fade away. 9 more days. I just have to be patient.

I cant wait to hug him to kiss him to hold him to tell him I love him so much to tell him how much I want to spend the rest of my life with him and the best part I cant wait to have our long midnight chats, laughing and falling asleep in each others arms at night. The thought of him being so far away makes me tear everytime. He has made such a big impact in my life and I cant imagine what life would be without him. I've never met someone who could understand and listen to everything I had to say with so much patience and love.

If I could I would tell him everyday that I love him..

Now its back to feeling lonely. A lonely Sunday night. If I was home we would be making lunch, watching a movie, having ice cream and laughing over every little thing.

Appreciate everything you have infront of you because when its not around you will miss it...alot..

Never say never

I remember every detail so clearly. The image is still stuck in my head of you smiling down at me, leaning closely and then gently kissing me on my lips. You took my hand and gave it warmth under the cold midnight wind. You gently move your hands across my legs making sure I was not feeling cold. You gently push my hair away from my cheeks to kiss me on the nose. Why does it feel so wrong but so right at the same time?

Happy 14th Month Baby

It has been five days since I left. I'm starting to miss home especially my other half. I miss him the most. I just realised how hard it is to not have him around. Everything is so different without him. Every morning I wake up hoping that he will magically appear and sweep me off my feet. I cant explain how much I've missed him. Every time I hear his voice I'll start tearing and laughing at the same time. Feels so good to hear him but the thought of him being so far away from me hurts me so bad. I cant help but smile to myself every single time I look at his picture. Oh that boy has a way with me. All he has to do is say one word and I am the happiest person.

Happy Anniversary Baby. One year two months and still counting. Its been amazing being with you and you've made me so happy. I am so in love with you and that has never change since the first day you kissed me. My love for you has grown deeper everyday and you never fail in making me feel so positive and confident of myself. You've taught me to be strong and courageous. Gosh I wonder what I am gonna do without you. You didnt just show me love but you also provided me with joy and laughter. Ive grown to be so attached to you and I noe no matter how far I am I will always have your love. We've committed to each other on the day we wore our rings and I will always stick to it and be faithful to you. I love you and I will always do. I meant it baby when I said I wanna marry you one day. I meant every word..

Hopefully that dream will come true :)

Leaving?

Less than 10 days and off I go. A new adventure awaits me but mixed feelings fills the air. Its reality kicking in and whether I like it or not I have to deal with it. The thought of leaving him behind brings tears in me and I cant seem to brush that feeling aside.

Just when I have found somebody so loving so handsome who loves me for who I am, I have to go. We have been together for more than a year and oh it so amazing. Every single second with him was fireworks! Nevertheless I am so in love with him. He is the epitome of my dreams and no one has ever made me feel the way he has made me feel. Everyday i miss him more and the feeling I had for him when we first started dating has gone deeper. He is one person I would love to spend the rest of my life with.

I guess what i fear the most is having someone else take my place when I am not around. The feeling of being cheated and betrayed clouds my mind. Ive had recurring dreams that he was with someone else who wasnt just any other person. She was someone I knew, someone i cared about. The image of them together haunts me. Its just a dream at the end of the day.

Its all about trust and faith and I know we will make it through. 2years will fly by and hey the bright side is atleast I will be seeing him every few months :)

Oh I adore him...

six months later and im still crazy in love with you..

I love the way you tell me that I’m beautiful, and the way you make me laugh like no one else.
I love the way you move the hair away from my eyes, and then kiss me on my face.
I love the way when you take my hand and put your hands around my waist
I love the way you'd sing to me at random moments even though you sound horrible.
I love the smell of your cologne lingering after you've hugged me
I love the way you speak your mind and tell me about your opinions.
I love that you're not afraid to cry and show your feelings.
I love the fact that you would message me in the middle of the day just to say " i love you "
and tell how much you missed me.
I love the way you tell your friends about me and smile when you do.
I love the way you whisper into my ear, the way your voice sounds so close to me.
it feels like I’m dreaming.
I love the way you do all of these and the fact that you're not ashamed to do it
and I'm glad to be yours...
Happy Anniversary Baby!
We've made it thru half a year and guess what im still madly in love with you.